When Authenticity & Attachment can’t coexist
At times unintentionally we don’t allow space for authenticity & attachment to take place. Our goal is for our parenting approach to hold space for both of these needs to coexist.
At times unintentionally we don’t allow space for authenticity & attachment to take place. Our goal is for our parenting approach to hold space for both of these needs to coexist.
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This is gold! I believe it’s also possible to also shift in different situations from being in one category to another depending on who you’re around. Definitely experienced all of these at different times. Is that a sign of growth, to be moving for example from freeze to fight?
Hi Esther,
Yes, we can experience various different states as different times. We might notice a tendency to be more frequently in one state or two states versus the other states. We can also be in 2 states at once, to keep this course as brief as possible i just went through each one separately. A sign of growth would be responding in a healthy way within that state. This is explained in the next section called “when authenticity & attachment can coexist”. So for example, one who tends to be in Fight mode, instead of yelling & screaming their point across, growth would be assertively stating what they want to share & being sure they are clearly heard. I hope this answers your amazing question!
Thank you your courses are so helpful.
I’m not clear as why a child that avoids facing a situation in which he has to choose authenticity or attachment , starts to engage in OCD behaviors. Can you elaborate on that connection?
Because it’s a way of distracting oneself from facing what needs to be faced. Our body becomes obsessed with something & moves away from the challenge we are facing. Do you see what I mean?
Yes, now I understand, Thank you for clarifying.
My pleasure. Feel free to ask any other questions you may have as you navigate the courses here.
Thank you Kayla for your kind words & this great question!